Holding Cells Aren’t Helping

This is the tale of my stay at the Lawrence Memorial Med 6 Psychiatric Unit. It outlines how poor care is given even when the stay is voluntary.

The Water’s Rising Past My Eyes

This piece was written while inducing a hypomanic state. I had a lot of scrambled energy that needed to come out and this poem is the product of the current state of my psyche. Lucky I have a new therapist.

Forgive me for my faults (because I can’t)

Forgive me for my faults is a new piece written on 9/26/19 that was sparked as an outlet to an episode of Borderline Personality Disorder. It’s often common for people with personality disorder to deal with false thoughts that are programmed into them.

Monthly Me: August

Content Warning: Medication problems, social stigma, suicide, and dementia are shared in this episode.

Heart Balloon

You and me Turns to We

In love with impossibilities
Like kissing fire on the lips
My desire wants to take my life
And in the morning I have to come to grips

Hallucination of Friendships

Taking medication
Like a precaution
To avoid the flood
Of memories
That overrun my mind
With sad ideas
And thoughts of you
Why do you like to invade me?

drawing blood

Drawing Blood

And as the sensation fades away
I cant deny it,
You’ve infected my heart –
I cant describe it

Christ of Pain

Christ of Pain

Webs of shadow
Tangle my broken dreams
Like unraveled intention
The plan has gone so wrong

Drowning in Dusk

Drowning in Dusk

Where has the feeling gone?
Oh, sun – Why do you hide from me?
The purest of flowers never grow
When the clouds cant provide
Don’t take my love from my life

Challenge Me Softly

Mix another drink
Clear my mind – I need to think
Stop the shakes so I can hold this pen to ink
My paper legibly
Said I’d be
Sober last Tuesday

Solone

Ive never felt like I’m
So alone
Was I meant to be
Solo
I cant control

Future Forward

All the memory
I ever had to waste
I made an enemy
Out of nothing more than haste
Pushing and pushing
Pushing future forward

Physcosomatic Erratic.

Waste away – the rot and decay
Takes you out to play
Make me one with
Make me done with
The evil plague you put inside.

DreamStress

What have we made here
In the sky’s falling distress
Oh what a mess – Oh what a mess
To my knees, I confess